The spread of internet cafes in Yemeni cities and the existence of chat websites
have attracted many youths, both educated and uneducated, especially as Arabic
chat sites have begun to proliferate. Young people turn to such websites
because they can do there what they cannot do in real life and freely expose
their feelings and desires.
In fact, Yemeni society is conservative, whereby tradition and habit reject
love relations and immoral behavior. For example, a man and woman who love each
other encounter difficulties or get into embarrassing situations when they meet
or try to meet. A woman is not allowed to imitate western societies and choose
her boyfriend or make friendships with the opposite sex.
Television, movies and videos also have influenced most youths who, as a
result, are beginning to change their attitudes in ways similar to western
societies. All these factors, along with some others, lead Yemeni youths to
online chatting, one way to escape the traditions and habits of their society.
In chat rooms, people use nicknames not necessarily typical of real males or
females. Hence, a male may use a female nickname and vice versa. Female users
undoubtedly prefer nicknames typical of their natures. This is why it is
difficult to distinguish between male and female users. Chatters feel secure
and no longer worry about who will identify them.
Men search for women in these chat rooms, as do women for men, and the kind of
relationship sought in most cases is flirtation. Therefore, when a man comes
across another man, he immediately ignores or rejects him. But if he happens to
find a female user, he wastes no time in pursuing, coaxing and trying to chat
with her for a long time. This is true of females, who easily are attracted if
flirted with or pursued.
Chat topics youths choose are romantic and to some extent social. A female user
may consider it a chance to look for an "imaginary" partner and waste her time
seducing others. A male user also may look for a member of the fairer sex with
whom he can enjoy flirting.
Nevertheless, frankly speaking, relations between male and female users may
develop into what is called "cyber sex." A.R., a 20-year old female, says she
can engage in different relations in chat rooms and no one can discover her
identity or what she does.
Youths sense pleasure as they indulge in such relations because through them,
they can satisfy their desires. Social science expert Dr. Khalid Ahmed said
television, romantic movies, videos and magazines influence today's youths, who
try to imitate what they see and hear. He pointed out that this is evident in
their behavior: some are inclined to behave savagely, some romantically and
others childishly. "A good way to expose their hidden feelings and desires is
by communicating with others through online chatting," he explained.
Nowadays most internet cafes have begun providing clients with web cameras
(webcams) to further facilitate communication with one another. As for Yemeni
females, there is no fear of being identified on-camera, because most are
veiled. They can attract males easily as they communicate this way - and easily
cheat them.
A friend confessed that he had been in online contact with a veiled female
pretending to be gorgeous. He said she became an obsession as he tried his best
to see her face and was not given the chance to meet her face-to-face.
Undoubtedly, as two people chat online using webcams, it becomes like a
face-to-face conversation. Moreover, as chatters appear on webcams, others can
identify them, easily distinguishing between males and females, and the
possibility of telling lies decreases accordingly. Those using webcams try
their best to be cautious, but the majority of youths use them only to
communicate with relatives or true friends. A positive aspect of webcams is
that sometimes Yemeni youths come across those from western societies,
especially if they know English well.
In America, Europe and some Asian countries, some users act badly, while others
appear nude while chatting online. Some Yemeni youths confessed they sometimes
chat with such sexually-oriented users. Unfortunately, male and female users
(especially those with the internet at home) like to indulge in such relations.
Additionally, most internet cafes have begun establishing private sections for
females, encouraging more females to explicitly chat with and watch obscene
acts on their webcams.
Other youths, most probably teenaged males, find freedom to use taboo words and
indulge in slang. I once happened to sit beside a 16-year old boy who was busy
messaging in a chat room. I was stunned as he rudely exchanged taboo words with
another user. Internet café owner Nasser Ali said most teens like to enter chat
rooms, especially Arabic sites, just to use a few abusive words while chatting
with others. They feel secure in doing so, knowing they will not be punished.
Looking at European and American society, online relations between men and
women often result in dating and sometimes end in love and marriage. Will the
same happen in Yemeni society, where most online relations are not taken
seriously?
